3 Books That Helped Me to Get Unstuck for Real & Know Myself Better

Read these if you often feel anxious, stuck & not present

Written for Books Are Ours Superpower, a Medium publication.

Photo by Emily

I’m both a lover & a hater when it comes to self-help books. For years, I came across cheesy books that said they will make you successful in 30 days, fit, rich, or whatever you want to improve at yourself. They’ve always made me cringe, and all the information was just common-sense or pure bullshit. At the same time, I am all for improvement and I realized that I have to keep an open mind and just research & follow the right people in order to find the good ones.

That is how I came across the first book that helped with my anxiety and the feeling of being stuck, by scrolling the internet. I’ve discovered Dr. Nicole LePera on YouTube & Instagram where she is known as The Holistic Psychologist, and in a few months, I was reading her book:


by Nicole LePera

This book made me understand that we all have traumas from childhood. The author explains how trauma doesn’t develop only from violent, scary, or extreme situations, but also from not being seen or heard as children, from being dismissed, or from having emotionally unavailable parents to name a few. She is giving relatable examples from her personal life, from her patients, and she backs it all up with research. The whole book is a guide that takes you on a healing journey and makes you acknowledge what could be your childhood trauma, how to process it, and how to live authentically. It made me understand my patterns, and how feeling stuck it’s one of my coping mechanism and why I feel anxious in some situations. I had these feelings since I was young, and this book help me realize why and made me take action. If you want to get in touch with your inner child and understand yourself better, this book could help a lot.

  • You can order the book here.


by Russell Kennedy

This one made me actually feel my anxiety and stop thinking. Dr. Russell explains how anxiety is first felt in the body and then in the mind (worries, negative thoughts). This blew my mind because I never thought about it like this. My usual approach at dealing with the negativity from my head is to try and think of the best scenario, basically, fight negativity with extra positivity. Which, as the author also puts it, is a good approach, but only a temporary solution because the root cause is not addressed. The root is not in the mind, but in the body, and the book shows you how to identify it and how to start healing. To give you a hint, you have to stay with that feeling in the present moment, which is referred to in the book as an alarmed state instead of the anxious state, which I think makes a lot of sense. All this alarm we have stored in our bodies developed during our childhood, so getting to know yourself better will do wonders, that is why I recommend starting with Dr. LePera’s book first and then this one.

  • You can order the book here.


by Carol S. Dweck

The third book helped me get rid of some old beliefs that didn’t serve me. The author introduces two types of mindsets:

the fixed mindset: “believing that your qualities are fixed in stone”

the growth mindset: “a belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts, your strategies, and help from others”

She gives examples of people who have these mindsets and tries to encourage the reader to desire the growth mindset. I had a fixed mindset growing up, and this book made me see that clearly and how this thinking made me give up quickly or not pursue something because I didn’t seem to have talent. I have to say even before reading this book I realized that practice beats talent, but after reading this I became more determined to try anything and not be afraid to fail. This book is addressed to everyone from parents, teachers, managers, to athletes and shows how practicing a growth mindset (even if you’ve always had a fixed one) can foster outstanding accomplishment.

  • You can order the book here.

What would add to this list?

P.S. The links from this article are not affiliate links, just an option to where you could find these books.

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